It’s been a rough couple of weeks with work. In fact, work has become increasingly busy. It was the end of the quarter and a race to get customer contracts closed up, signatures, etc. For those that don’t know, I work for a software company in sales. It can be very high stress, even more so now that the economy is the way it is. It has really hindered my ability to write. It has also afforded a little time to reflect on my prepping, my true preparedness, etc. During this reflecting period, I’ve started to feel like I am spending, spending, spending. I feel like a crazy consumer who has to have all this stuff. The word stuff by the way, is relative. By stuff I mean, anything from clothing, to a new CB, to continuing to purchase food (I am getting better at rotating), to the need for all these little things. And it seems the money keeps wanting to go out the door. Now, I do not feel that the items that are in need of purchase are frivolous purchases. They are a result of the recent hurricane and experiences to make life and the shift into survival mode easier. Are they necessities? Well, that is the quandary. When not in use, they are not really necessities. When the road is flooded out, trees are blocking highways, there is an accident ahead, etc., it would be good to be informed; in the case of the CB, of course, as an example.
I feel… I feel like I am just consuming and spending at the moment. “The more I learn, the more stuff I need,” keeps running through my mind. More food, more gear, more skills that might require more gear. I feel like I am starting to be wheel going round and round with no destination. To that end, the economy is not helping me, and not from a lack of resources perspective either. No, it is not helping because I feel the urge to accelerate preps, purchases, etc. I live in an apartment. It is starting to get full of (pardon the expression), shit. I am donating a ton of stuff (mostly clothes) to the Salvation Army this week. That is going to create a “little” additional space, but it is mostly clearing out some space in a couple closets. Hell, I have more rucks and backpacks than I think I will ever need. Some of them are going to the Salvation Army… I even recently looked at replacing my coffee table and end tables with storage type tables. Do you know hard they are to locate, at least good quality one’s anyway, not to mention how expensive good ones are. I am probably just ranting, but these are thoughts that have gone through my head for the past several days, and they are not going away… What’s a prepper to do?
I’ have thought about this long and hard. My conclusions are few. Slow down the purchase of nonessential preps? Some of them, I have been putting off some of these purchases for a year or more. In fact I cursed myself when I didn’t have better communications during/after Hurricane Irene. Part of that was my own doing, I was out and about the day after, and traveling back home from PA, but still cursed myself…
What are your thoughts? Have you ever felt you needed to keep consuming preps, etc, and feeling like it was just too much, even if the money was available?